health & happiness wellness

Vampires think my blood tastes like Natty Light

February 26, 2013
Iron and wood

Good thing I didn’t take these so I could use them for the photo.

Pop quiz time! Which of the following best describes you:

a.) I’m tired all of the time – mostly from insomnia, but I’m still tired even after I sleep for infinity hours.

b.) My brain is fuzzy because I have a chronic dull headache.

c.) Sometimes when I stand up, I get dizzy and my pelvis feels like it’s going to fall out.

d.) My heart starts racing for no reason.

e.) The inside of my eyelids are totally white, and I have giant dark circles under my eyes.

f.) All of the above.

If you answered f.) All of the above., congrats and welcome to the wonderful world of anemia.

I’ve dealt with anemia off and on since high school. I was the girl who got turned away at the high school blood drive because my blood didn’t sink to the bottom of that little vial. No Fig Newtons and Capri Suns for me, no sir. This hasn’t been an issue in recent years other than during my pregnancies and now. My C-section surgery last July left me with some blood loss, and I knew that I was anemic when I left the hospital because they told me I was. They gave me a bucket-full of pills (Percocet, ibuprofen, iron supplements, and of course, a stool softener because all those other ones make you constipated. Awesome, right?). I took the the pain killers, threw out the stool softener because the side-effects pamphlet said you can become dependent upon it to poo for, like, the rest of your life or something (I kid you not), and ignored the iron because it gave me awful cramps and terrible gas. (Sometimes honesty isn’t pretty, friends.) Seven months later, I’m still anemic. Brian calls me a non-compliant patient.

But then, my mom remembered this stuff called Floradix that my NYC midwife had recommended to me because apparently I’ve always been a non-compliant patient and wouldn’t take my iron back then either. Floradix is not a pill; you drink it. A single dose is 10 mL, and it’s non-constipating (Boo-yah!) and vegetarian. Yes, it tastes exactly like pennies and is a totally delicious alternative to chicken livers. If you can do shots of Jäger, you can do this.

Confession: I almost had a breakdown in the health food store because I have felt like sh*t for so long that the thought of actually feeling like a normal person was completely overwhelming. (Thanks for holding me in the supplements aisle, Brian. You’re the best.)

Friends, if you think you may be anemic – for whatever reason – I implore you to call your doctor and see about an iron supplement. You will feel so much better. And the vampires will love you again.

P.S. This is so not a paid endorsement. Please, I wish. I just love this stuff, and I really, truly hope it might help you because that’s what friends are for. Smooches.

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