I thought I was going to leave the house today. The weather said, “I don’t think so.”
In other news, Scarlett has graduated to big 9 oz. bottles. That is a lot of milk to pump, so luckily, I have one of those fancy double pumps. The pump came with lots of fun components and informative literature. There was one photo in particular that I really enjoyed. I found this on the inside cover of the instruction booklet:
Clearly, my new pump will do so much more for me that just pump milk. With my new breast pump, I will have the time to put on my make-up and wash and blow-dry my hair. I will lose all of my pregnancy weight, plus a few pounds, tone up without lifting a weight, and even out my tan. My live-in housekeeper will bring me fresh cut flowers from my garden on a tray with my breakfast croissant and coffee. My nanny will take care of my baby for me, so that I can look serenely at a photo of my baby instead of trying to entertain her and pump at the same time. Good thing I already bought the pump and know that I can’t take it back because it’s a “personal” product. This photo makes me feel much more confident about my purchase.
I love being a mother, and I love my baby more than anyone or anything, but motherhood is a far cry from a soft-focus glamor shot. I know that reality is often a tough sell, but really? I understand that a photo of a frazzled mom with dirty hair and baby vomit all over her shoulder isn’t exactly sexy, but that’s what I’ve got going on, and I’m going to guess that it’s what most moms have going on. Really.